Four Letter Word
by redskiez
Summary: His mind supplies him with a word that he has not considered using for another human being for almost as long as Deidara has lived. (TobiDei week, day 4.)


**Day 4. Tragic/romance vs humor/romance**

Even though tension has always been present between the two long before they decided to address it, Obito realizes he's never really given it a name. The deep fluttering in his stomach, the tightness in his throat. He thinks he knows what it is but after his first experience, he'd much rather hold onto his feelings before he officially labels it.

He listens to Deidara now as he sits on his heels, ironing their cloaks — the courier's blood got all over their clothes while they carried his body. Obito didn't imagine Deidara would be one of those people who read things out loud, but then here he is, slowly muttering the words of the book. There's a certain rhythm to his reading, a low rumbling tugging him to something akin to sleep. He's unfamiliar with the text, and even though Deidara is an artist, he could not quite manage to deliver the emotions the author probably put in the story.

Deidara also speaks with his grunts, which takes Obito out of the tale. Though he's trying his best to understand the context with such bland words, he finds it hard to become invested. Putting down the iron, he turns and begins to crawl over to Deidara, settling down crossed-legged beside him, knees touching.

Obito peers over Deidara's shoulder to see what he's reading, the latter stuttering for a moment before continuing to read, clearly a little shocked that his partner is suddenly so close to him.

"Hm," Deidara grunts, flipping the page. Obito manages to read the story quite fast — of course, he's cheating with his Sharingan — and frowns when he realizes what kind of story it is, without even knowing the beginning and the end.

"I didn't know you'd be the type to read romance novels," Tobi says, tilting his head and watching Deidara's expression intently. Surely enough, there's a familiar kink in his eyebrows that betray his barely hidden annoyance even as his partner smiles, shutting the book (but not before making a mark on which page he left off).

"I don't like romance novels, hm," Deidara says slowly, trying to form his words without dooming himself. Obito could tell the calculated way he's sitting, the little raise of his eyebrow and the sickeningly sweet smile on his lips. "This isn't a romance novel, it's a tragedy."

Obito looks down at the book. The cover seems inconspicuous enough. It is simply a dark, dull shade of purple-pink with a sort of golden accent on the sides, framing the hardcover. There are words on the cover that seems to be the name of the novel, but the fickle gold is too weathered to make out its original letters.

Its obvious age makes Obito curious again.

"Have you had this book for long? I never see you carrying it," Tobi says, trying to reach out to pick up the book and examine it for himself, but Deidara — surprisingly — is faster than him and snatches it away before he even raises his hand.

"I keep it hidden, it's a gift from… well, no one that important now, yeah," Deidara huffs and shoves it underneath his cushion, almost sitting on it. Though, Obito could tell that he is being careful. The book must mean a lot to him, then. He could guess who it's a gift from. It's clearly someone he once — or perhaps still — cares about, though of course Deidara would never admit it. He barely admits that he cares about Tobi in front of other Akatsuki members, lest he loses his 'cool' image in the others' eyes.

Not that Obito minds. Deidara more than makes up for it behind closed doors.

"What's it about then? It looked like a romance to me," Tobi says instead, knowing when to stop testing boundaries. Deidara would say something when he wants to. He knows this man is still an immature brat sometimes, too caught up in his own pride to recognize flaws in his own words or actions, but underneath there is an understanding artist that has such a unique view of the world, crafted and molded by harsh experiences. He trusts him.

Deidara pouts for a second, shifting his weight from one leg to another as he's sitting on his heels. "You've only read a few pages, hm," Deidara says instead of answering Tobi's question, crossing his arms. "And I haven't read it in a while. I was just refreshing my memory of it, you know? I wasn't really trying to enjoy it, yeah."

"Deidara," Obito says, voice rough. A stern voice that makes Deidara shut up immediately, jaw snapping shut with an audible click. If he's ever curious about the different octaves his voice could go, Deidara never says, for which Obito is glad about.

"Fine, hm," Deidara grumbles. Sighing, he knows he has no way out of it and tries to explain as fast as he could. "It's about two teens falling in love, but they're each from two factions that happen to be at war with each other, hm. It makes it harder for them to meet up and pursue their feelings. Impossible for them to officially be together, yeah."

Obito nods, eyes carefully watching Deidara's body language. There's a slight tremor in his arm, a shaking in his voice that he doesn't want to be too obvious, and his eyes are looking every except for Tobi.

"In the end, in order to be together, one of them drinks a potion that imitates death even though it doesn't actually kill them, hm," Deidara grips his bicep, turning his face away from Tobi. "But the message doesn't get to the other and they think they're really dead, yeah, so they kill themselves thinking they'd be reunited in heaven, or whatever afterlife you believe in."

Although Obito couldn't at all understand how sad all this is, he does take into consideration that he's not reading the story in the flesh. This is just the skeleton, which probably takes away all of the empathy that's supposed to be instilled upon you.

"Then, the one who drank the poison wakes up and finds their loved one dead beside them, yeah, and they're so saddened by this discovery that they commit suicide right there in order to be truly reunited," he finishes. He falls into a silence then, biting both of his lips at once.

Obito couldn't help but find this utterly amusing. It is a simple story with a rather simple plot. Perhaps, if he is more invested in stories and tales, he'd be more interested in such a romantic yet tragic novel. His life, however, is tragic enough as it is. He needn't more tragedy in his life when he's trying to build a world without such pain.

He suddenly finds Deidara strange. Who would read such a sad tale on their own accord?

"Do you like the story?" Tobi asks.

"Yes, hm," Deidara says after some hesitation. "But I'm telling you, yeah! I'm only reading it now because I'm refreshing my memory of it!"

"What made you want to read it again, anyway? Doesn't make sense for you to suddenly want to refresh your memory, senpai," Tobi laughs, reaching out to poke Deidara's side, who promptly begins to protest against such domestic abuse.

After shoving Tobi's gloved hands away, Deidara leans away for a moment, staring at Tobi's mask with such an intense look in his eyes. "You, hm," he says eventually.

"Me?" Obito says instinctually, though after a few moments he begins to pick up the pieces on his own. Deidara remembers he has a romance novel tucked away somewhere and probably wants to read it in order to remind himself of love. Though, he must have forgotten that it's a tragic romance, which would explain the dodgy glances and the strange body language.

In a world like this, it's not easy to remain together until they have nothing but gray hair and wrinkly skin. It's perhaps worse to wake up to, or even watching, your significant other getting murdered. Obito understands this pain. She might not have been his other half at the time, but he did care.

And caring made his heart bleed.

Pushing the thought away, Tobi smiles and takes Deidara's hand, which has been, until that point, firmly grasping his arm. He laces their fingers together as he holds his smaller hand in his gloved one, feeling the slightly strange texture of the mouth against his palm. "You don't have to worry about anything," Tobi says, puffing out his chest in a display of power. "I'm too powerful to be beaten."

Deidara laughs then and Obito does not take offense. He hardly ever shows what he could really do in battle. His partner nods, blonde hair bouncing. "Sure, yeah," he says, covering his mouth. "I'll take your word for it."

"You have my word," Obito says, sitting up straight again, watching Deidara laugh with tender eyes. As he continues to laugh, that wonderful sound that isn't the same as the one he lets out during a fight, or when he's flying overhead as he's about to blow something up. It's lighter and somehow more genuine. It's the essence Deidara puts into his artwork, rather than the explosive force he lets out afterward.

It's softer. It's clearer.

His mind supplies him with a word.

A special word that he has not considered using for another human being for almost as long as Deidara has lived.

"Deidara," Obito says, causing Deidara to open his eyes and turn his attention to him, still chuckling at the remains of Tobi's humorous display. "I love you."

Deidara stops laughing then, his hand on his mouth for another reason. His eyes are wide but Obito doesn't care at that moment, mask already pushed to the side and leaning down. He pushes Deidara's hand away.

Nothing feels out of place when their lips meet once more and everything is in its right place. The stars align and the sun shines bright, and all is right in the world when they have each other and that magical word.

Because surely, nothing could go wrong.

* * *

Hey guys, Red here!

Why do I keep writing these at 12 am? I need to sleep, damn it. I have a 9 am lectures tomorrow and I had one this morning! I'm beat!

I put a little more effort into this one. No reason why other than the fact that I've had two lectures on how to 'improve' writing and I had a little spark of motivation. Though, not motivational enough. I'm dead inside.

Also, I revamped my Tumblr and managed to get my old handle back! It's redskiez dot tumblr dot com. You're welcome to visit it. There's no longer embarrassing fandom things. Sadly, I also deleted my old TobiDei posts. Sorry about that! You can still see some of them in annoyingly small resolutions and limited heights on Instagram, though! The Instagram handle is 'tobidei' and I'm quite proud of myself for snatching that handle back in 2012.

Thanks for reading,  
-redskiez:)


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